Indian Wedding

While in Surat I had the opportunity to attend my friend Abhishek's wedding.

The wedding itself ran for 4 days total. Rough schedule was as follows:
Day 1 evening: groom hosts his extended family' plus bride's close family / friends for an evening of entertainment
Day 2 evening: bride hosts her extended family plus groom's close family / friends for an evening of entertainment
Day 3 morning: the groom goes through rituals in the presence of ladies (both sides of the family?). These include bribing him to take their food, lightening his skin, and lunch to him and his single male relatives / friends. Occurs at groom's house.
Day 3 evening: groom hosts bride plus single female relatives and friends for a meal they serve to the ladies
Day 4 lunch: bride hosts groom and male relatives / friends, serving them.
Day 4 evening: groom's family marches festively through the streets with a band, lights, fireworks, and dancing. Received by bride's family at hall with elaborate decorations. Some dancing at the receiving point, then inside for the rituals of marriage (can last up to 2.5hrs, historically up to 5 hrs). Given the length, these are intimate. People can observe, but generally mingle and eat instead.

Why so long? An Indian wedding forms the social life of the community. Friends, extended family, coworkers, neighbours etc. will all join in at least some of the festivities. It's a chance to relax with friends, and meet new people. For families with children of suitable age, the "parade of singles" is a chance to pursue potential matches. Events generally all revolved around socializing, food, music, and dance, in that order.

Venue for the first event with live band on stage.

Pavilion setup on the street in front of the house. It was used for a variety of events. Here the ladies of the community gather together with the mother of the groom to bemoan how horrible her future daughter-in-law will be. This happened concurrently with the first bride hosted main event.

Main venue

Parading through the streets

Elaborate entrance for receiving the groom and family on the last day

Food was initially scary as everything was in peanut oil. After that was resolved though (they switched to sunflower oil), I could actually eat most things. At the start the food was too spicy, but I grew used to it by the end (to the point that food initially was bland in Istanbul!).

For the final evening I acquired traditional Indian attire. I had funny looks throughout the week as the only non-Indian at the wedding. That was nothing compared to adding the Indian attire. I even was told I looked Indian :)

Overall I really enjoyed the wedding. It was great to see Abhishek's home, meet Krishna, and partake in the celebrations. One part was quite jarring: after the ceremony, it was time to send off the bride to join the husband's family. At a Western wedding, this is a happy occasion. Tears may be shed, but they are typically of joy or mixed emotions. The final send off of an Indian wedding is often sad and sombre, as the bride says farewell to her parents for what historically may be the last time. This certainly was not the case for Abhishek and Krishna, but they had the added stress that Krishna will eventually be moving to a foreign country far from home.

A great time in India! Thanks Abhishek and Krishna for inviting me to be part of your celebration.Looking forward to seeing you both back in Canada!

* I've deliberately kept photos of others off my blog. I'll post a photo of me and the couple if Abhishek gives the go ahead.